Living Below the Line for Send a Cow - Day 3
Made it to Day 3I wrote almost an entire blog post on the train on the way home from Cambridge this afternoon. But it's no longer there. When I say on the train...I mean on my phone...whilst on the train. Not literally on the train. But I wish I had. Writing it on the train would have been more reliable than writing on the Blogger app it seems. Not that I am advocating drawing all over trains. But at the moment I don't care. Blogger ate my post and I'm hangry. Do what you like.
I'm hungry. I was an egg short today because I ate one the evening before. I had to prepare my lunch prior to a meeting in Cambridge and as I was putting one in the sandwich and saving one to nibble on, I accidentally just, kinda, sort of, ate it. Now I have an egg deficit. Living below the line is turning out to be really hard. I should be asleep right now. But my stomach wants breakfast already.
I'm fatigued, but at least the caffeine withdrawal has worn off. That was the worst. An evil, penetrating wedge in my head that I'm sure felt akin to the migraines I used to get when I was small. Knowing that I have a freebie coffee from accrued points just waiting for me at Starbucks just adds to the pain. On the way to the train station, I smelled that there were 7 coffee shops between my house and my train, including the little mobile one in the city centre that wafts the coffee smell temptuously at you as you walk by.
Birthday cakes at the regional meeting were difficult to ignore to. I had to pretend they weren't real for fear I might just bite one out of someone's hand before I had time to think. As the train pulled into the station, all I could think of was how I still had to walk home, cook, eat, clean out the cat litter, do the washing, have a bath, wash up, clean the house, hang up the washing, do my obligatory job hunting, eat said food, and write this blog post when I felt like I'd just run a half marathon, rather than sat on a train, desperately trying to keep awake.
Hence, here I am. When I shoulda, coulda, woulda gone to sleep. This blog post is Day 3 of the challenge but it's actually after 2am of Day 4. Half the stuff on my list is not done and added over to my stuff-to-do for tomorrow. Oats in water with a banana for breakfast again to look forward to. Knowing that I won't do my morning yoga again tomorrow before breakfast because the first thing on my mind in the morning will be to eat.
When I first started this challenge, I seriously thought that the biggest problem that I was going to have was being bored of what I was eating. I hate eating the same thing two days in a row. There are exceptions. Bacon obviously. Oh dear god, my stomach just knotted and growled at me at even just the thought of bacon.
Caring about how repetitive my weekly meals were going to be quickly became totally unimportant as I found myself scraping the bottom of the frying pan to make sure I got out the last few grains of rice. I started thinking that maybe I shouldn't have worried about the frivolity of stock cubes, onion, spices and butter to fry it and just spent the extra few pence on more rice so it would have been more filling.
I envisioned those images that are so often shown, portraying hunger, where people are scraping bowls with their fingers trying to get out the very last bit. Or children picking up spilled rice grains from the dusty ground. I thought I knew how privileged we were. I didn't. But I do now. I know that on Saturday, when this is all over, I can go back to "normal". No matter how much I am struggling, I only have to make it to Saturday and it's over. For many people around the world it's not just a challenge. Their daily reality is that food is scarce. Their health and lives suffer. That's why I wanted to take on the Live Below The Line challenge for Send a Cow. They are doing so much to help people grow their own food in Burundi, the world's hungriest country. And even a very small amount of money makes a dramatic and lasting improvement to people's lives. It all adds up.
Apologies for any waffly randomness, spelling mistakes, word omissions and/or similar. I will go back and edit when I am feeling more myself and am considerably more awake.